Thursday, March 23, 2006

Don't Be That Person In Class!

This is a list of people in class that annoy me to no end. I have mentioned bits and pieces of these characters in previous blogs, but consider this the compilation.

1. The Question Asker- This person is the one asking a million questions during class. They range from the typical "Can you repeat that?" or "Can you explain that? I don't get it" every two seconds to the absurdity of shit like any question that begins with "This is a little off topic, but..." Not only is this really annoying, but it also takes away from time that could be spent finishing the lecture early and me leaving class.

2. The Arguer- This dipshit know-it-all is the one who thinks that he is somehow smarter than the professor. Yes, I understand that sometimes the professor makes a minor mistake and can stand to be corrected. This is different. I had some guy in math class try and argue math theory with the professor (who has a degree not only in mathematics/education, but also engineering). Not to mention that the guy arguing with him was a complete moron; he must have been at least 50 years old but still in a 100-level math class. Save yourselves the embarassment and don't argue with the fucking professor, because chances are you are wrong and chances are 100% certain that you are annoying me.

3. The Question Answerer- This idiot could also be The Question Asker sometimes, because these personalities tend to overlap at different times during class. As is eluded to in the name, this is the person that feels the need to shoot up his or her hand whenever the professor asks a question, be it rhetorical or not. They come in two sub-types: the people who are too booksmart for their own good, or the people that are dumb as fuck but think that they are smart. You know you're a culprit here when the professor (continually) has to say, "Anyone else?"

4. The Talker- Possibly the most annoying of all these types is the group of people who talk ALL FUCKING CLASS. [If the three people that sit in front of me in History of Jazz Tues/Thurs from 12:00-1:15 ever read this, I absolutely detest all three of you.] It's not like I even care that much about the material. In fact, in nearly all my classes this semester, I am not interested in the course at all. But the fact of the matter is, I do need to pass them and when I have Jane and Joe Talkathon sitting next to me it makes it extremely difficult to pay attention. Shut your god damn yapper and save it for after class with the rest of the mongoloids.

5. The PDA Couple- Another disgusting situation. My eardrums are already being filled with the mindless jabber going on around me by The Talkers so naturally I should expect to be annoyed via my eyeballs as well. The PDA Couple is the couple who thought it would be really cute to take a class together. They always seem to sit in front of me too, so that I can be easily distracted by their stupid public displays of affection. They're always holding hands or writing retarded little love letters back and forth or sneaking kisses when the professor turns around like it's some sort of act of rebellion. In reality, all this is doing is making me want to vomit.

6. The Unfunny Jokester- This is the guy (almost always a guy, because most girls know that they're not funny...just kidding. But as an aside, seriously, Wanda Sykes, don't ever do stand up again) who likes to shout out things during class that he (and sometimes his nearby frat brothers) thinks is really clever and funny. He'll also field questions from the professor and answer with some sort of ridiculous declaration, expecting the room to erupt in laughter. Surprisingly, it never does. And while I'm on this guy, please, if you're going to try and be funny, while I don't applaud your attempt at humor, I will give you this pointer: answering a simple question with an intentional wrong answer IS NOT FUNNY. I'm pretty sure that shtick got played out shortly after junior high school.

And there you have it. I know that 6 isn't really a psychologically pleasing number, but I compiled this list in classes today and I couldn't really think of any more. I'm sure there are some out there, and when I find them I'll be sure to update.

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Tucker Max Sued!

That's right, folks. Internet comedy writer Tucker Max has been sued by some "socialite" and "PR Man" named Anthony DiMeo III. I'm not too familiar with this douche, but I believe he is an heir to some sort of fortune from blueberries. That's irrelevant though. He's suing Max because of a message board on Max's web site that he claims is libelous toward him. From what I can understand, this guy basically doesn't want anyone speaking badly about him anywhere and is being a big cry baby. What ever happened to free speech?

I can't imagine DiMeo actually winning this battle (he's suing Max for over $1 million). It should be interesting to see how this whole thing pans out, though. Here are some links:

Tucker Max's Blog

DiMeo-related threads on the Tucker Max Message Board

The Original Article

Another Metro Article

Another Related Article

A much longer article

Help spread the word about this case; it could mean very big things for free speech on the internet.

Monday, March 20, 2006

Post-St. Patty's Day Post

I hope everyone's St. Patty's Day was as awesome and eventful as mine. I had an amazing day starting at noon and ending at 3 a.m. (or something?). Anyway, because I am a lazy sloth, I am not actually going to make a post about what happened because my partner in crime, Will, has already done so. Check out a photo-and-comment-filled documentary of our day here:

Will's St. Patty's Day Post

As soon as I figure out why my AudioBlogs aren't working properly, I'll get them re-posted for your enjoyment. Until then...

Friday, March 17, 2006

It's Finally Here

As I write this, a little after 1:30 a.m., it is officially St. Patrick's Day! This holiday, started to celebrate Irish heritage (or some bullshit like that) has now turned into an all-out binge drink-a-thon. Not that I need an excuse to drink, but on what other day of the year is it socially acceptable to go to a bar at noon? That's what I'll be doing. Tomorrow (today) I will be waking up and going to play jazz music for a little bit, then heading to a bar to enjoy a very early afternoon drink or three. Unfortunately, I have to be back on campus to attend an economics class and then take an astronomy test, but soon after that you can bet your four leaf clover that I will be back downtown celebrating and taking part in various festivities. Then, after a few hours of Irish car bombs, beer pong, and other fun stuff at a friend's house party, the night will be capped off with an amazing show by Forman. That is, assuming that I am still on my feet after 9 or 10 hours of wild times.

Check back here for frequent AudioBlogs throughout the day.


HAPPY ST. PATTY'S DAY EVERYONE!

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Hilarity Ensues

As another way to occupy my time online, I have co-created a message board with a friend of mine. It's basically an open forum for everything ranging from humor to music to origianl creative submissions and everything in between. If you've got some time to kill and want your ideas or opinions to be heard, or you just enjoy reading interesting or funny stuff, it might be worth your time to check out. It's called Hilarity Ensues for the time being and can be found here:

http://hilarityensues.to.md

It only takes a minute to make an account and then you can start posting freely.

Friday, March 03, 2006

Bush Must Go?

Get a new sign, hippies.

this is an audio post - click to play