Thursday, March 23, 2006

Don't Be That Person In Class!

This is a list of people in class that annoy me to no end. I have mentioned bits and pieces of these characters in previous blogs, but consider this the compilation.

1. The Question Asker- This person is the one asking a million questions during class. They range from the typical "Can you repeat that?" or "Can you explain that? I don't get it" every two seconds to the absurdity of shit like any question that begins with "This is a little off topic, but..." Not only is this really annoying, but it also takes away from time that could be spent finishing the lecture early and me leaving class.

2. The Arguer- This dipshit know-it-all is the one who thinks that he is somehow smarter than the professor. Yes, I understand that sometimes the professor makes a minor mistake and can stand to be corrected. This is different. I had some guy in math class try and argue math theory with the professor (who has a degree not only in mathematics/education, but also engineering). Not to mention that the guy arguing with him was a complete moron; he must have been at least 50 years old but still in a 100-level math class. Save yourselves the embarassment and don't argue with the fucking professor, because chances are you are wrong and chances are 100% certain that you are annoying me.

3. The Question Answerer- This idiot could also be The Question Asker sometimes, because these personalities tend to overlap at different times during class. As is eluded to in the name, this is the person that feels the need to shoot up his or her hand whenever the professor asks a question, be it rhetorical or not. They come in two sub-types: the people who are too booksmart for their own good, or the people that are dumb as fuck but think that they are smart. You know you're a culprit here when the professor (continually) has to say, "Anyone else?"

4. The Talker- Possibly the most annoying of all these types is the group of people who talk ALL FUCKING CLASS. [If the three people that sit in front of me in History of Jazz Tues/Thurs from 12:00-1:15 ever read this, I absolutely detest all three of you.] It's not like I even care that much about the material. In fact, in nearly all my classes this semester, I am not interested in the course at all. But the fact of the matter is, I do need to pass them and when I have Jane and Joe Talkathon sitting next to me it makes it extremely difficult to pay attention. Shut your god damn yapper and save it for after class with the rest of the mongoloids.

5. The PDA Couple- Another disgusting situation. My eardrums are already being filled with the mindless jabber going on around me by The Talkers so naturally I should expect to be annoyed via my eyeballs as well. The PDA Couple is the couple who thought it would be really cute to take a class together. They always seem to sit in front of me too, so that I can be easily distracted by their stupid public displays of affection. They're always holding hands or writing retarded little love letters back and forth or sneaking kisses when the professor turns around like it's some sort of act of rebellion. In reality, all this is doing is making me want to vomit.

6. The Unfunny Jokester- This is the guy (almost always a guy, because most girls know that they're not funny...just kidding. But as an aside, seriously, Wanda Sykes, don't ever do stand up again) who likes to shout out things during class that he (and sometimes his nearby frat brothers) thinks is really clever and funny. He'll also field questions from the professor and answer with some sort of ridiculous declaration, expecting the room to erupt in laughter. Surprisingly, it never does. And while I'm on this guy, please, if you're going to try and be funny, while I don't applaud your attempt at humor, I will give you this pointer: answering a simple question with an intentional wrong answer IS NOT FUNNY. I'm pretty sure that shtick got played out shortly after junior high school.

And there you have it. I know that 6 isn't really a psychologically pleasing number, but I compiled this list in classes today and I couldn't really think of any more. I'm sure there are some out there, and when I find them I'll be sure to update.


At 3/25/2006 1:09 AM, Blogger Chris Burrows said...

That pretty much covers it. I really enjoyed this entry, great stuff bryan.

At 3/27/2006 9:19 AM, Anonymous lesley said...

i've never known a 1, 3, 5 and very rarely have a come across a 6, my classes where always full of 4's and 2's though

At 3/28/2006 4:33 PM, Anonymous billy said...

very good list my friend. pretty much direct to the point. although, if i were to add one i'd say it'd be the dumb ass mother fucker, that just so happens to always sit next to me, that constantly asks me questions about what's going on. instead of actually paying fuckin attention to what the professor is saying, they spend they're time daydreaming about letting their dog like peanut butter of their balls or whatever gets their gears grinding. then when its time to do an activity or assingment or whatnot, they turn to me with the million "How do you do this?"'s. They need to do themselves a favor. Shut the fuck up, don't ask me a god damn thing, and continue to be the worthless wastes of life that they are.

At 3/29/2006 5:35 PM, Blogger Bryan said...

lol, yeah man. I've come across a few of those over the years.


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