Saturday, February 25, 2006

More Fun With AudioBlogger

This occurred a couple weeks ago at the end of a night of heavy drinking. Will and I had somehow strayed from the group, although I’m not really sure how that happened. We probably went to the bars or something. This five-part account begins at the bus stop as Will and I, plus a few other random people, are waiting for the last bus of the night to come take us back to campus. Enjoy.

Part I: Bus Station Action (2:56)
Listen for: slurred commentary about bus station; shouting to a girl who we thought we knew but it was not her; Will mocking a douchebag, followed by me calling him out; me being confused about recording.

this is an audio post - click to play

Part II: Who Doesn't Love The Doors? (4:51)
Listen for: meeting ScreamKid; Doors quotes, Doors "singing" by everyone in the immediate area; me continuing to be an idiot and not realizing that I can just stop recording at any time I please, not actually having to wait for the whole 5 minute maximum recording time; Me: "Give me the 5 minute warning...Shit, it's 5:16 what should I do?"

this is an audio post - click to play

Part III: Still Waiting for the Bus (2:01)
Listen for: complaints about waiting for the bus; a poorly-told Chuck Norris joke; me repeating things multiple times that probably don't even need to be said once; ScreamKid's re-appearance for a slurred batch of musical commentary.

this is an audio post - click to play

Part IV: [FINALLY] On the Way Home (2:11)
Listen for: me continuing to talk to everyone I see; Will’s lucky seat; Me: “You’re not going to strike up conversation?” Will: “What do you want me to say?” Me: “Just say 'Hey what's up baby?' ... I’ll get them to record on my audioblog.”; me being successful.

this is an audio post - click to play

Part V: The Nightcap (3:08)
Listen for: shameless self-promotion; way-too-elaborate “bros before hoes” rant by me, completely out of left field; the "Final Word," if you will, by Will and I; me being mysterious (there really was no story at the end).

this is an audio post - click to play

-90% of the people you hear on these recordings were total randoms.
-We waited at the bus stop for nearly 45 minutes before the bus came.
-For some reason, I thought I had an elaborate tale to tell in the last AudioBlog, but in reality, I just got off the bus, walked the wrong way because I wasn't paying attention to anything, and then upon realizing I wasn't going to my dorm, I turned around and walked home.

Let me know what you think about these AudioBlogs. Lame? Entertaining? Stupid? Comments of any nature are always welcome.

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Good Times

Here's a worthy AudioBlog. Enjoy.
Warning: I go off on a tangent for about a minute at first.

this is an audio post - click to play

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

AudioBlogger Debut!

Alright, so it's not the amazing first post that I wanted. However, I did manage to successfully record myself and a couple of my friends on our walk home from the bars last night. It could be funny or stupid depending on if you know us or not (or whether or not you think drunken fools are funny). Anyway, a better one will come next time, I promise. This is only the beginning; think of it as a "testing 1 2 3!"

this is an audio post - click to play

Sunday, February 12, 2006


I thought I was going to have something awesome to post last night. I have been saving this idea for a while, but given my intoxicated state of mind, I didn't do it the right way and it got lost. Some of you may know what I'm talking about. Anyway, I have figured it out now and there will be an even more awesome post coming very soon. Check back within the next few days and hopefully it will be here.

Monday, February 06, 2006

Television Commercials Part II: Superbowl XL Edition

I was going to make an elaborate post about these commercials. However, something unexpected happened: almost every single one fucking sucked. There was a serious lack of effort this year on the commercials that are supposed to be the best, most memorable, funniest, etc.

The most creative ones came from Budweiser unfortunately. At least they made an effort with some different ideas. A couple of those stuck out in my mind (e.g., the one with the bear, the one with the magical fridge), but even they weren't all that funny. Another contender for "Almost Funny" is the Michelob Amber Bock Light one in which the girl gets nailed by some guy in touch football, followed soon after by the girl taking out the same guy at a bar. The only one that actually made me laugh was the one for a cell phone (Sprint maybe?) in which it was advertised that, among other things, it was "Crime Deterrant." When the guy in the commercials asks the other guy how it is crime deterrant, he gets a cell phone thrown at his face. I thought that was funny.

Some of the worst I can remember were the Burger King Whopperettes (how over-the-top and idiotic was that?), the Toyota Camry commercial with the bilingual son and father (which, when compared to the Camry Hybrid, made absolutely no sense), and among others, the repeated ads by ABC for Grey's Anatomy. Christ, after the 513948th time it was advertised, I was almost interested in what was going to happen in the episode. Almost.

Overall, I was very discontent with the Super Bowl XL commercials. Given that, though, here are my favorite and least favorite commercials:

Favorite Super Bowl XL Commercial: "Jelly Bun Month"

I think a certain amount of time was allotted for local commercials, and very surprisingly, my favorite one was a local commercial for Holland Farms. It showed a nun wearing dressed in her habit, holding a huge jelly donut-like pastry. An announcer then said, "Don't forget! This month is Jelly Bun Month at Holland Farms!" I thought it was so hilarious. Maybe it was the expression on the nun's face or something. Either way, it was hands down my favorite one this year. I couldn't find the commercial online, but to find out more about Jelly Bun Month, go here.

Least Favorite Super Bowl XL Commercial: "Dove: Campaign for Real Beauty"

If you haven't seen this commercial, check it out. It is absolutely fucking preposterous. It shows girls (with nothing wrong about their appearance whatsoever) with various phrases like "wishes she were blonde," "hates her freckles," "afraid she's fat." Dove has the solution though: they have actually created a Dove Self-Esteem Fund for girls! What a fucking joke. In light of the recent natural disasters (the tsunami, the hurricanes, etc) don't you think we could find a better use for this money? Not to mention we've got children in third-world countries who don't even have fucking clean water to drink or food to eat. But none of that takes precedent because little Susie is insecure about her weight or hair color, thinking that those 4 or 5 vanity pounds or some hair dye will make a difference. This commercial got me incredibly pissed off. If you donate money to Dove's Self-Esteem Fund, words can't even describe how stupid I think you are. Give the money to people who really need it, not some self-concious bitch. I won't even waste time making a list of different ways that money could be better used instead of going to Dove's Self-Esteem Fund. I will, however, offer a better solution: GET A FUCKING CLUE, GIRLS! It's very simple; if you don't like your appearance, change it! Think you're fat? Work out. Don't like your freckles? Use makeup. Wish you were blonde? Get some fucking hair dye! Use your brain; think outside the box a little, if needed. There is absolutely no need for a fucking fund, pissing away peoples' money trying to make you feel less insecure. Chances are, you're a lot better off already than most people in the world.

Well, that turned into a rant. Anyway, to see the rest of the Super Bowl XL commercials, click here. Hopefully we'll get a better batch next year.

Edit: I did leave out one commercial that was very funny. The FedEx commercial with the cave men was fucking hilarious, and when one of them left the cave and kicked the dinosaur I was cracking up. I had forgotten about that at the time of writing this blog though. Even considering this commercial, I'd still choose the Jelly Bun Month as my pick for funniest overall. You had to have seen it to appreciate it, though.